


I really wanna see you - I really wanna feel you

by smorrebrod



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: AU, F/M, alec is bi, clalec, tags and rating will be updated
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-27
Updated: 2018-05-03
Packaged: 2019-03-10 07:06:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13497180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smorrebrod/pseuds/smorrebrod
Summary: Since Jace is Alec's and Izzy's brother, Clary is totally convinced that after the break-up with Jace the lines are clear. Little does she know that Alec and Izzy are quite fond of her by now and of course both of them try to help her to get through this. It's then, that she realized that she always was in love with the wrong brother!





	1. Chapter 1

"You can't stay here, this is a boathouse." Simon crossed his arms and shook his head.  
"You live here, and so can i!" Of course Clary didn't want to stay here. It wasn't exactly what she would call cosy. But what other choice did she have? She couldn't stay in the institute. It would be inevitable to run into Jace and she wanted to be nowhere near him right now.  
Simon must have guessed her thoughts, because he now tried his 'voice of reason': "Clary, i guess it's hard now for you being in the institute and all, but sooner or later you have to face Jace!"  
A sigh. Simon was right, Simon was most of the time right. And maybe she really wanted him to convince her, but nonetheless it wasn't easy and just about thinking seeing Jace was too much for her. "It's not just Jace. I'm pretty sure Alec and Izzy don't want me there as well. Well... Alec actually never wanted me there so..."  
"Then what's this?" Simon nodded in the direction of the open door and Clary had to lean over to actually see the tall Shadowhunter coming in the direction of the boathouse. She didn't really know what to think. She would have suspected Izzy to come along but not Alec. Surely it coulnt' be anything good. He probably was mad at her for breaking up with his beloved brother.  
She quickly got up and stepped outside the boathouse.  
"So... did Jace send you?" Aggressively she crossed her arms and stared him right in his hazel eyes. Alec seemed a little confused, he raised an eyebrow.  
"No, actually i... well... we were a little worried about you. Are you alright?" His voice was soft and actually really full of concern.  
Clary got teary eyes, up until now she was only angry but Alec's calm presence and his soft voice made her realize how vulnerable she felt right now. Simon stepped outside and took her hand.  
"I think she is not alright." He said simply and with a little nod.  
"Uhm, look Clary maybe... you can stay in my room tonight. It's far from Jace's room, and we will promise that you will not run into him. But come back to the institute. It's your home and Izzy and i... like i said, we're worried!"  
Clary closed her eyes. It was a tempting offer. And she really could use the support of Izzy. And talk things through.   
"Alright. But, you really don't mind?" She dried her eyes.  
"I wouldn't offer it to you, if it wasn't alright." He shrugged, but then he gave her a little smile. "Shall we?"  
Their eyes met and suddenly Clary felt way better than she felt for a very long time.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you don't like, don't read :) this is for the fans of the pairing not for the haters!
> 
>  
> 
> how sweet was the Clalec hug in the last episode?

Clary was freezing. Alec's room was not exactly warm. Or cosy. It was really Alec-like. Organized and spartanic.  
When Alec saw how Clary was getting a little jittery, he instantly turned up the heating with a little "...sorry" and gave her a blanket.  
"No it's fine." Clary made a waving gesture. She felt already like a big inconvenience and gave him an apologetic look. But Alec tilded his head and smiled a little: "Look you take the bed okay, i will sleep on the coach. And i will get you a tea, so you will get warm." He turned around but hesitated. When he turned around Clary saw that his eyes were full of a sad understanding: "Everything will work out." He said with his typical simplicity.   
Clary gave him a long look and slowly nodded: "Yeah. Maybe."

When Alec left the room, Clary colapsed on the bed and was staring at the ceiling. Get the fuck over it, she told herself. There was no maybe. She knew it was over. Jace was history and she had to move on. Even if it hurts. After a while, the room was not really getting warmer, she wondered where Alec might be. Even if Clary only wanted a good night sleep and forget about her worries at least for a few hours, she was curious what took him so long. 

When she approached the institute kitchen, he already could hear Alec's deep voice, calm but a little upset.  
"Alec, i can do what ever i want. I don't need you to babysit me." It was Jace, and only hearing his voice brought back some tears to Clary's eyes.  
"You don't really want to hook up with a random Shadowhunter girl. Come on, give me the Whisky and tell Lauren it's not gonna happen...."  
But Clary could see that Jace took the bottle in a mocking way from his brothers hands and flipped him off, while leaving throw the back door.  
She took a deep breath, when Alec turned around and actually saw her.

"Shit, no... how long were you standing there?" He looked at her in shock but Clary just waved him off.  
"It's okay. You know, i probably deserve ending up alone." Her eyes were still teary and she was still freezing.  
Alec gave her the cup of tea from the counter and shook his head: "What are you talking about? You are the most kind person i've ever met. And to be honest...." he stopped and shifted slowly from one foot to another. Almost like he was a little nervous.  
"Yeah?"   
"...i always was a little jealous of my brother."  
Clary blinked rapidly. Did she just hear that right? Slowly she was looking up to meet Alec's big hazel eyes.

And then there was this little spark of hope that maybe she wasn’t doomed to end up alone.


End file.
